Shake it Out!

I swear whenever I’m having a rough day I watch this video or listen to this song && I always feel a least a tad bit better. I always wanna dance around the room when I’m watching it!


I’ve got to learn how to cook; amongst other things…

Let me just tell you guys right now, I’ve never felt as much pressure as I do now on having to figure out this whole “house wife” thing. The funny thing about it though is that I’m nobodies wife, just a girlfriend and a mother, which I guess does call for me to have at leastĀ some “house wife-like” duties but, I’m not gunna lie, I’m a tad bit frustrated.

Let’s get you guys updated. Back on August 11 myself, my daughter, the boyfriend, and a good friend of mine got into a pretty rough car accident in Biloxi on our way to Pensacola from New Orleans. Long story short (’cause I’d rather spare you the gory details) baby girl broke her leg (femur to be exact; biggest bone in your body, blah blah) and had to be put in a spica cast a.k.a. body cast! Definitely not one of the better moments I’ve had dealt to me in life, but the point is that I decided to stay in New Orleans with the boyfriend and his family so that Aliyah could have all the medical attention she’d need from the children’s hospital.

Now, it’s been about, oh I don’t know, almost a month that I’ve been down here, and it should go without saying that the boyfriend and I have definitely not been used to this at ALL. He’s gotten on my nerves in ways that I didn’t even know anyone could annoy you, and I’m pretty sure I’ve done the same to him, bless his heart. With all the built up stress that I’ve been dealing with, I want to tell him “You’ve got yourself a ticking time bomb here. Watch it.”, instead I always try to deal with the issues myself (ex. crying in the bathroom during the wee hours of the night so no one hears you, calling my best friend so I can have some one to vent to, etc.) so he doesn’t have to deal with what I’m dealing with. I mean, because who needs TWO people that are on the verge of insanity? It’s just the fact that when I think about how my brand new car, that I didn’t even get the chance to put insurance on, got totaled, and how my poor kid, who loves to run around and explore, is being confined to a body cast, it all seriously makes me sick to my stomach and drives me to the brink of a total breakdown. It seems I’m being a bit dramatic doesn’t it? I don’t try to, I just feel that I have a very outspoken personality, except when it comes to the boyfriend, poor guy. I honestly don’t tell him enough about what’s going in my head so he always seems caught off guard when I have one of my “spastic moments”.

With all this being said, I’ve basically got myself quite a list of things I need to work on, and I feel almost as if I’ve been thrown in a course of House Wife Training: How to Keep Your Man Happy. Not pleasant, at all, and most certainly not what I was expecting.

  1. Cooking: Apparently this is what females are supposed to do for that special man in their lives and quite frankly I think I may have only prepared about 2 dinners my whole life. I’ve obviously been spoiled by my mother, because I was never required to cook, and if I was, I simply refused to. Not because I’m a brat, more because I just never felt like it. It seems I’m a tad bit lazy. I do honestly think if I put my mind to it I could cook anything I wanted (following a recipe of course), but I’ve never, so much as now, had someone require of me to cook breakfast for them, and fix their lunch, like actually over a stove. (My daughter is in a stage where all she eats is chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, simple foods basically. In case you all were wondering whether I was starving her to death or if she was eating her limbs)
  2. Cleaning to the 5th power or something to that sort, because never have I ever cleaned so much as I do now. I’m doing laundry, not only for myself and my daughter now, but for the boyfriend as well? This is totally foreign to me. The crazy thing is that this is what he EXPECTS me to do, and in a ridiculously stupid way I feel like I really am supposed to. I mean what is that? Besides the laundry though, I am also expected to pick up everything behind him. He makes a mess and leaves the room looking atrocious, I have the glorious honor of putting it all away.
  3. Stroking his ego, because that’s what every man expects but doesn’t tell you that you’re obliged to do. Also, it tends to get you what you want if you throw in some batting of the eyelashes and back rubs without him putting up a fight, or better yet, starting one.
  4. Expressing myself better: I am obviously not open enough with my significant other, and trust me I realize this. It’s just that I can’t see myself being completely open like that with another person until after years of getting to know them, and the boyfriend and I are still working on year 1. It’s not that he’s done anything wrong, just that quite a while ago I (not purposely) taught myself to keep things under wraps and just deal with my issues myself (and I know this is random, but it made me think of a song: Florence + the machine-Shake it Out. Haven’t heard it? Youtube the video and watch. Amazing! I promise)

All these things, along with many more, are things I’m trying to get used to and understand. I’ve never had to take care of another adult! And the audacity that he’d think I should just know I’m required to do all these tasks anyhow! What century are we in anyways?! Dare I not or else I’ll be replaced; that’s the ultimatum I believe.

Note from the author (yes I’m serious)

I promise everything isn’t as horrible as I think I might have made it sound! The boyfriend really isn’t like some cruel, evil dictator ruining my life, and things really aren’t so bad. I just tend to have a wild imagination and I run with it! Seriously though, dealing with all of this is definitely new stomping grounds for me. I want to be this amazing girlfriend and mother, but at the same time I’m like “this guy’s insane if he thinks I’m going to be his personal maid”. Point blank: try not to take meĀ too seriously when reading my blogs, as I do have an uncanny sense of humor. Laugh a little and ease up [: